I don’t know why but I’ve spent the last night, and most of today, fretting about what to name this series of blog posts. I’ve been looking for something catchy but I’ll probably just go with ‘Monthly Summary’ – I guess it’s short and to-the-point, if not really, really boring .*
So, anyway, as you’ve probably already guessed I’ve decided to add another series of writing to my here blog. This one will be a bit more personal and you might even get to know me a bit more aside from my literature and museum interests.
I’m sure I’m not the only person on the planet who feels like January drags. I always have a really busy January too, it’s full of birthdays including my own. It’s normally quite a busy month for me and it also means that it should, in theory, fly by. It doesn’t. I did have a really great birthday this year, and I was surrounded by my friends and family, you can’t really ask for much.
To be perfectly honest I didn’t go into 2017 excited at the prospects of the coming year, I wasn’t optimistic at all. In fact, I was just recovering from a mini-health scare and was having serious relationship issues. We’d broken up after having spent five and a half years together and being engaged. Neither of us had adjusted well to living in the UK again. I was feeling low, and afraid of what the future would bring. I used to feel quite proud of myself and everything that I’d done in the past, but I just felt like an abysmal failure.
New Year’s Eve came and went, which was an absolutely awful night in which I’d had too much to drink and ate a foot long meatball marinara with cheese. I wouldn’t this there was anything wrong with that except the fact that I’m a proud vegan – obviously not a very good one – but then again I’m putting it down to needing some comfort food. I’d sat on the tube at 2am declaring my love for the sandwich, getting crumbs all over my dress and stating “Nobody understands how good this is!” I promised myself New Year’s Day that I would have no more relapses, give up drinking and going out to clubs (which really I don’t like that much anyway)
A few months later we (me and my boyfriend/fiancé) decided to try again. He was feeling much more positive, I’d admitted to my faults, and he came back home. It’s been going well, we’ve been trying hard and we’ve both definitely changed. He’s my lobster. He wouldn’t get that reference but all you Friends fans will.
So, the beginning of the month took an unexpected turn, a good one though. We both settled into a routine and I continued to learn the piano, and I’ve even started to do some writing which I haven’t done in such a long time.
Unfortunately, however, my African Pygmy Hedgehog Percy, became seriously ill and we had to make the decision to put him down. He was such a feisty little guy. He’d developed Wobbly Hedgehog Syndrome – which is not as funny as it sounds. It’s basically MS for hedgehogs and eventually, he would have become paralysed, and starved to death. It was such a hard thing to have to do. I know that many people will laugh and scoff, but I felt like I’d lost a friend that night. He was a very big part of my life and I still miss him all the time.
Onto the positives: I’ve visited a few museums, hopefully more will follow, and I’ve been enjoying the books that I’ve been reviewing so far. I also had my new tattoo done, which has turned out really good (luckily), went to the Star Wars exhibition that I loved, ate so much carrot cake for my birthday I was fit to burst and visited Ballie Ballerson which was definitely an experience. I’ve also applied for my second masters, which I will hopefully be accepted on, and that will give me the chance to start some kind of career.
Like I said to a friend yesterday, I’m very much content – which is much better than happy because happiness is fleeting. I think that a lot of this feeling is to do with this blog, and it becoming a source of expression as well as something to work on that I love and enjoy.
*I chose to go with EOM – End of the Month. Not very catchy or original but easy to remember.